Hold 'em, Fold 'em, RUN!

02:22 pm: *DANCE OF JOY*
CMC was offered a job! A job! A joooooob!

*wild flailing of arms!*

I'm not gonna lie, this has been a wild week already.

11:01 am: All my stuff is here, in boxes marked "Misc"
Moved! The only things still at the old apartment are my bicycle and fridge foods, which I will claim tonight.

The cat spent most of the first day huddled in a corner of a closet. I very much understand that impulse, but alas, there was no closet huddling for me. I had to turn this vast sea of boxes into livable space! Fortunately, I have a CMC to help me do that. The priorities for the first day were: bed, kitchen, media. It was perhaps a bit archaic, but I took care of the bedroom and CMC set up the media. At least we took on the kitchen together, to salvage a few feminist points. By the end of the day, I couldn't think anymore. Not "think straight," but think at all; I was physically and mentally spent by 9:30PM. So we had a drink and went the hell to bed.

Can I tell you about the wonders of doing a load of laundry without including a single quarter in the process? I may? Oh, good. IT IS SO AWESOME I CANNOT EVEN EXPRESS IT.

I only have three remaining types of boxes, as follows:
5% Dining Room Dishes (Good for displaying in the hutch)
45% Books
50% Misc

I don't know what is in the Misc boxes, but it always seems to be something I need right that second. Moving is like an extremely long version of a dreary Christmas, where you get to unwrap gifts you sent to yourself of your own stuff that you already knew you had.

Priorities for tonight:
- Laundry
- Bookshelf placement so books can be put away
- Closet arrangement

10:52 am: It's been a week
ITEM! My mom was sick all last week, so sick that her work made her go to the hospital to get tested for swine flu. Guess who had swine flu? MY MOM. She's fine now, but when she told me she couldn't get why I cracked up.

Mom: It's not FUNNY. It's SERIOUS.
Me: Yeah, I know, but you're fine, and it's just THE FLU.
Mom: I feel like Typhoid Mary. Especially because I went to see [Immunocompromised Friend A] and [Immunocompromised Friend B] last week! When I was contagious!
Me: ...Mom, you knew you were sick already when you saw them and you risked infecting them with /whatever/ you had. It's not the swine flu that's the problem there.
Mom: True. But I still feel AWFUL.
Me: It's okay, Mom. And remember, it's just the flu, not Death Flu, okay?
Mom: :(

Anyway, my mom is part of a pandemic! Whee!

ITEM! I have too much stuff and I have reached the point of moving where I hate everything I own. Why do I have so much CRAP?

ITEM! Beets + Billy Blue Cheese + Crispy Garlic Slices = NOMNOMNOM

ITEM! The squirrel came back. The bastard.

10:17 am: Things I Already Knew But Moving Has Reminded Me Of
1 - I have a lot of crap
2 - I hate moving
3 - Comcast are utter, utter bastards


Also, thanks to an evil squirrel, I will probably just leave both of my AC units in the old apartment free of charge; no one's going to pay good money for an AC with huge frikkin' chew holes through both the little accordian things. Though the tabasco seems to be keeping the thing at bay now. *fists of rage*

Less than a week to go!

01:04 pm: I've only made it worse
There is a spider in my apartment. A SPIDER.

It made its presence known when I went to pick up a stray cup of water and found it swimming in the water at the bottom.

Showing what was (for me) a great deal of composure, I set the cup back down IMMEDIATELY and slammed another cup upside down over the first.

Well and good. But now... now I have a cupstack on my coffee table that I can't move. In a perfect world, yes, I would take this cupstack over to the toilet and flush this spider into oblivion. But at the same time, I've clearly made the spider ANGRY to the point that when I liberate it, it will undoubtedly undrown itself, defy physics and launch itself at my FACE. So on the coffee table it stays.

CMC will be home tomorrow. He is in charge of spiders, I am in charge of bees and wasps. This will be taken care of in due course.

In the meantime... spider... *shudder*

10:33 am: Quit POKING me!
Ugh.

( Cut for TMI Girl Stuff )

In other news, I'm really tired of the landlord showing my apartment, because it means I need to keep the packing to a minimum and the place in a high state of cleanliness. The other day, I thought there was no showing, so I tossed clothes willy-nilly including several bras. The agent calls up and is all, "Hey, we're going to have a look in an hour! BYE-EEEE!" and I'm all "AUGH, NO! UNDERPANTS! STREWN! NO!" and he's all, "It's cool, the apartment has looked fantastic everytime I've shown it," and I reiterate, "AUGH, NO! PANTS! INTIMATES! NOOOOO!"

Is it odd to harbor an aversion to strangers seeing one's underpants?

01:51 pm: Continuing Evidence Sids Should Not Read Comment Threads
Important Things I Have Mentally Yelled in the Direction of a Comment Thread (but didn't post because that would mean signing in and actually, you know, POSTING):

1 - If you get pregnant while on birth control, continuing to take the pills will not give your baby HORNS. You MORON. It's just a hormone pill! The same hormones that are ALREADY IN YOUR BODY. Also, birth control is not an "abortion pill." If you are already pregnant, regular birth control, even a bunch of them at once, won't do a damn thing. Plan B is the same deal. It /stops/ you from getting pregnant, it won't end a pregnancy already implanted.

2 - You claim to know how the government functions. Yet you seem to think President Obama is not fixing your favorite personal issue right nownowNowNOW. He's president, not God. He's not even Jesus. He's just a dude who got into office FIVE FRIKKIN' MONTHS AGO with about 178,109 crises all happening at once courtesy of that previous administration. He can't single-handedly change the make-up and mindset of Congress (if ONLY *sigh*). He can suggest a lot of stuff, and push on certain issues, but CONSTITUTIONALLY he can't legislate. Clear? What? "Executive Orders" you say? "Signing Statements?" Really? Is that the way you want your change brought? REALLY? I'm sorry, but that's not governance that's authoritarianism.

( Three more paragraphs of ranting )

3 - Fer the love of- Look. Kate Harding can defend her own damn self, but you have GOT to realize that promoting size acceptance is not the same as "glamorizing fat" or encouraging everyone to laze around eating junk or demanding that everyone find a certain body-type "hot". It's just about accepting that people are worthy of attention regardless of their weight. You are a size, and you are great. I am a size, and I am great. That person over there? Their size is whatever it is and they are great. If any of our sizes change, up or down... psst... WE ARE STILL GREAT. I hope you all eat healthy and get some exercise that makes you feel good and strong, but whether you do or not is none of my damn business.

It's weird, right? We don't have these big hate-judgments based on lung capacity; like I hope you all live away from smoggy cities and do a lot of exercise that depends on deep breathing. But some people are just never going to be able to take a good deep breath, regardless of how much cardio they do and crystal clear the air. And some people are Lance Armstrong. Just sayin' is all.

12:47 pm: EEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm getting a new apartment! In a two-flat! It is a bit further from the El, but I think the Fashion Wednesday ladies will all thank me on behalf of their knees, as this time it's a 1st floor.

There's FREE laundry down just three steps!
There's a HUGE oven and stovetop!
There's a MAJILLION square feet of closet space!
There's a garden!
There's a parking space included in the rent!
There's a Jewel RIGHT OUTSIDE THE BACK DOOR!

But I think the best feature will be the CMC who will live in it with me. And the cat.

We're moving in July. Ish. Sometime. Because of this:

Sid: I'll see if I can talk the landlord into doing half-month's rent for July so we don't have to pay two full months rent on all three places.
CMC: I don't think he'll go for it.
Sid: I bet he will. Can't hurt to ask. And if he doesn't, we'll get a different place, no problem.

*later, Sid calls Landlord*
Sid: So I'd like to move in /later/ in July, so can we do a half-month's rent?
Landlord: We-eeellll...
Sid: My lease isn't up until the end of July, and I don't want to pay two full rents. Plus it would give [Current Tenant] a little more time to move if she needs it.
Landlord: Would you consider it if I charged you [amount less than full rent, but slightly higher than half-rent] and you signed the lease for July 1st?
Sid: It's a deal! Let's meet up and go over the lease.

I probably could have haggled him down even more, but the rent is low for the neighborhood, and it's already a sweet deal.

Go me!

10:42 am: EEE!
This weekend is going to be very busy.

Tonight there is RibFest and Up.
Tomorrow there is Cubs game and OMG DYLAN MORAN.
( Cut for Dylan Moran squee )

Sunday there is looking at apartments and IT Crowd.

Maybe I'll sleep some time.

01:04 pm: Exhaustion
I'm having a hard time deciding whether I would be more calmed by petting a kitten or being petted in the manner of a kitten. The answer, of course, is both, perhaps with a nice tot of scotch.

As it is, I must do a conference call instead.

02:30 pm: Sleep is the thing with jet packs
Home at last!

I saw Eonlj, and tried on scads of bridesmaid dresses. I was the largest maid of the pack, but that just meant the dresses all fit me without the need for clips. Win for biggening!

Shiniest thing I've seen on the internet: Catlogue of Digitized Medieval Manuscripts. For real. Go find one or two and tell me that isn't DROOLWORTHY. *digitally pets the manuscripts* *especially YOU, Morgan Picture Bible in Latin and Persian*

OO! Or maybe ESPECIALLY the Life of King Edward the Confessor. *pets*

01:11 pm: Exhausting Being Me
I did so much last night, I can't even actually believe it. Seriously, I hit the door to home running. I did laundry, had dinner, made calls, wrote a bajillion emails, reconfigured some tracking info, watched the cubs game, and who even knows what else. I outlasted CMC; he went to bed and I worked for another hour or so. But I feel so productive!

And now, tired. =/

I've also finally conquered my fear of bad news and asked around about home mortgages. Good news! I can get a home loan! Bad news! For not nearly enough to buy a nice place in a good part of town! Drat. It's not the payments that would do me in, it's the new requirements for 15% down in "distressed market areas" which is code for "the entire United States." So now I am moving on to plan B (or possibly J at this point) wherein I rent a place with CMC to save more money and continue to build up a down payment.

Though I may be waiting until June to actually look at places. My schedule's a wreck and a half until early June. *fonk*

12:30 pm: Adventures in the Hills
I have not been camping since I was in my early teens and forced by my parents to go on the Episcopalian Youth Death March Canoe Trip, after which I swore I would never camp again. But as I gchatted to Min, true love will camp, so this weekend I:

- Helped set up a tent and rain fly moments before a torrential rain hit. It was cool.
- Played with fire.
- Did not get bitten by a single insect! A first!
- Did not get sunburned, thanks to 50 SPF lotion and a lot of shade.
- Ate my first marshmallow in several years. (okay, first three marshmallows.)
- Hiked a lot. That was fun!
- Saw a bunch of stars.
- Pointed out a lot of naturey things to my fellow hikers. (treeees. caves! birds! bunnies! (cute and cool) bugs!)
- Tried to climb rocks.

I am not very good at climbing rocks, and I don't have the drive to become good at it. But I love CMC, and he loves climbing rocks, so I'm happy to tag along and belay him so he doesn't fall to his death, and look at the pretty trees while we're at it.

CMC went out of his way to make sure I was warm and dry and fed and happy, and I'm so glad I went; I've almost never seen him so chipper as 6:30 in the morning when it's a day to go climb rocks. It's well worth a little inconvenience to my creature comforts.

09:49 am: *Immense Amounts of Wangst*
Today I feel like a wreck. Like ten pounds of fail stuffed into a five pound failsack.

EVERYTHING in the WORLD is due today, and I'm already exhausted and behind and about ready to find and strangle that damn cheerful bird outside my window.

My strongest impulse is to say "FUCK IT" and run to the hills to be a dirt farmer. Dirt farmers aren't stressed, right? Right?

10:13 am: Critters
I saw a baby pigeon last night! I think it had fallen from its nest, because it wasn't doing so well with the whole flying thing. It had gnarly mottled chick feathers on its head, and wee, ill-proportioned wings. It was gone by the time CMC and I got back from dinner. Hope it's okay!

Fermi the cat has responded to the spring by shedding. And when I say "shedding" I mean "generating an under-skin wormhole to the hair dimension and pulling wads through to the brush." I took eight FULL brushfuls of hair off him last night, and this is a shorthair Siamese! WHERE IS THIS HAIR DIMENSION AND HOW DO I STOP IT?

10:22 pm: But WHY?
I have survived Mother's Day Weekend with four generations of Sids. It was lovely, but... Dear. Lord. It was a full weekend.

Of Note:

- Hey there, Airport ID Checker Guy. ID check? NOT the ideal place to hit on the hot ladies. Even if I was one of the hot ladies. READ THE ID AND MOVE IT ALONG.

- My nephew is adorable. And apparently about 89% drool.

- Beat my dad at our official Sid Visit Scrabble Game, but it was /close/ and a great game: 342-330.

- Saw Star Trek at the IMAX. Movie? I liked it a lot, and it is an excellently serviceable series reboot, A++ would see again. The IMAX? Was more of an IKindaBig. I have seen MUCH maxer maxes. But the sound was good. Perhaps I will have to see it again at the NavyPier IMAX.

- SidMom lost her keys. We found them in the trunk later, but my favorite part of the story was this: We were at Kohl's, had just finished shopping, when she discovered her keys were missing. So we go back in, split up, talk to customer service, etc. When I track down mom again, no one has the keys, but she's holding a dress. "I didn't find my keys, but Sid! I found this dress for you to try on! :D? :D?" To which I respond, "We just got a dress and we're going to miss Star Trek if we don't go with SidBro now." I felt a /little/ bad bringing her down, but fer srs ma, focus.

- I did not know I could reach a fill point with bacon, but clearly, I can.

- I am home, and CMC is still away. I am lornly, but mostly okay.

12:24 pm: You do not have Avian Bubonic Mexican Swine SARS
Things I Have Done:

- Purchased prints from Min. You should do it, too! Because after May 10th, you cannot, and then you will be sad. Go HERE and follow the instructions. For the record, I got these six:
Davis Theater (and tiny plane)
Eggplants
Fern
zip zip zoom
Tribune building
Gentleman Toe
(And some day when I have an awes game room with a bright green pool table, I'll get a big print of this one.)

- Joined Yelp as a reviewer. This is a sickness.

- Made steak thing for dinner last night. It is always amazing: so delicious for so little time and effort.

01:09 pm: Southeast Michigan is not actually part of the "Chicago Area"
The past few days have been extremely productive, even if not always for my personal benefit. Sunday I went over to friend E's house for Zombie Craft Day; wherein craft projects long buried and forgotten are dug up and completed. Not being the crafty sort myself, I didn't have any projects, zombie or no, but had a great time as a willing Igor to the craftier attendees. W had a HUGE Milenni- Milleni- Han Solo's ship Lego kit that had never been opened, so I was able to nurture my latent OCD through sorting Legos. I really, really like sorting.

I also helped E plant herbs and put fringe on a scarf that had been awaiting fringe for a year. And there was pizza. NOM.

Other weekend activities included ribs and Wolverine, a movie I found mostly inoffensive and a fine backdrop for eating popcorn. ( Spoilers for Wolverine, but not really big ones. )

CMC and I went to Kuma's on Sunday night because he's had a month-long hankering for another Kuma Burger. After waiting for two hours, we had delicious foods, and then watched The Wire.

(And reading all this, it sounds like I only care about food. Which is untrue. Okay /kind of/ true. But not. um.)

I'm kicking myself for not calling my Dad yesterday. Every year I mean to call him on May 4th and tell him it's Star Wars Day. So far, I have only succeeded once.

Happy Cinco de Mayo!

02:36 pm: A few things
Went to Cousin M's wedding reception thing and survived to tell the tale. Now, a few more stories.

( How we plan dinner )

( Geek Love Part CXVIII )

11:59 am: Bards and such
Happy Shakespeare's Day! I am glad he lived and died and wrote. Okay, not /glad/ that he DIED, but the alternative would be less pleasant, I think. Lurching Zombie Shakespeare? Emo Immortal Shakespeare? No thanks.

I'm kind of annoyed with the universe right now; it seems like I can't ever do anything fun on a weekend because I have to go somewhere. I really do NOT like obligatory travel. Travel for fun? Awesome. Travel for family? I love my family, but some months I'd like to do something on my own time, you know? Like, there was Easter in Michigan, this weekend is a wedding in Louisville, and in two weekends I'm going to Missouri for Mother's Day. *sigh* It is HARD to be so in demand!